It’s Officially ‘Blue Monday’

Christmas is over, the decorations are back in the loft, you have over indulged, your New Years Resolution is long abandoned and your bank account is dwindling with payday seeming like it’s taking forever to appear.

Yep. It’s officially ‘Blue Monday’.

What makes people so down?

This seems like an easy question with a simple answer.

  • No money
  • Miserable weather
  • Back to work
  • Put on weight
  • Overspent

But it is not as simple as it appears. After all, not everyone will be suffering with feeling of worry and anxiety at this time of year.

So here’s the truth….

People don’t feel down BECAUSE of these things. They feel down because they are blaming these things. But you cannot feel miserable without creating miserable thoughts.

I’m not suggesting that these events are not ideal, but how much of your time and how many of your thoughts are based on these things that are outside of your control?

Many people feel so unhappy because they spend a large amount of time brooding and obsessing over all of the negative aspects of their present experiences and do little to take action or control.

Think of it this way. If you had a fire pit that represented how unhappy you are feeling, every time you have a negative thought about how bad things are, it would be like throwing another log onto that fire.

Eventually, that is going to be one huge raging fire that will be more difficult to get back under control!

How do I take back some control?

Once you realise that stress, worry and anxiety are not happening TO you and that you are creating them with helpless and powerless thoughts, then you can take action!

Here are some helpful tips too take back control of your thoughts and feel more powerful throughout January and beyond!

1. Start listening to the thoughts you are creating.

Ask yourself this: “The thought that I am thinking – is it helpful?” If it’s not, challenge why you are thinking it and change the thought to something that IS more helpful. Remember – thoughts don’t happen TO you, you are creating them.

2. Don’t brood and overthink.

When you find yourself brooding and overthinking just remember that fire you are building. Each one of those thoughts is an extra log for your fire.

If it is something that you can take action on, have some more helpful, powerful thoughts to get your going.

If it is something you cannot take control of, let it go. The negative thoughts are not going to change the situation, they will not make you feel better (in fact quite the opposite, they will make you feel MORE powerless) and they are not helpful. Change them or bin them and move on.

3. Look for the positives in your day.

This is not as difficult is as it may seem. After all you have become an expert at finding the negatives. It is NOT because there are more negatives, but because you have trained your brain and practised looking for them.

You need to start retraining your brain to focus on the positives. Even the teeny tiny ones will make all of the difference. Try to list between 3 and 5 things every day that have gone well. It may be that you took the dog out for a walk even though you didn’t feel like it, maybe you had coffee with a friend or simply just sorted a bill or task that you have been putting off.

4. Don’t give your self a hard time.

We are all guilty of this and again, we are usually brilliant at it! We are great at being kind to other people and giving them advice about cutting themselves some clack, but do you do the same for you? Probably not.

Again, this is just a bad habit of thinking that we have got used to over time and with practise. Listen out for how your inner voice talks to you. Challenge your thoughts and change them to something more helpful and useful and practise being your own best friend.

5. Get out and about.

Sitting at home overthinking and feeling helpless will not change your situation or your mood. Getting out and about may not change your situation, but it will give you something different to think about.

It might be just to go for a walk or visit family and friends. It doesn’t have to cost anything and there are lots of things going on in the community that you can get involved with. Try something new! Get involved with an organised beach clean, dust off your bike and go out for a ride, find somewhere new to go walking, make a cake. Anything! This can become one of your positives for the day too!

If you want support or help

Thriving is not something that happens to people who are lucky. It is something that people learn and practise – just like being physically fit and healthy!

That means you can learn to Thrive too! In just a few weeks times you could have learned the skills you need to Thrive for life and not have to feel you need to learn to ‘cope’.

If you would like to find out more about The Thrive Programme and how I can help you to overcome your issues, quickly, simply and predictably. Get in touch to book a free consultation either face to face at my clinic in Uttoxeter, or via Skype.

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